Forgiving others is challenging especially when you believe that the hurt or damage that was done to you was not warranted. You want to be forgiven by God and yet you want to be avenged of the hurt that was caused by others. I believe that moral sins are the worst, no amount of money or healing can truly repair the damage. That is why God tells us not to do those things.
Matthew 6:14-15 “For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive yours.” BSB
Does this mean that if you can’t forgive someone God will not forgive you. It plainly states that this is the case. The revelation I had about this scripture is that the sin or trespass was something that was done unintentionally or accidentally. So if someone backs up into you in a parking lot and he apologizes then you should forgive the person. If you don’t, and instead you scratch his car to get even, then I believe this scripture applies.
What if someone does something willingly hurtful even evil to someone, like murder or rape, are you required to forgive the person.
If they are truly sorry and repentant, I believe that we are required to forgive. But if they aren’t remorseful or sorry, then in this case you can let go of the offense (forgive) and leave the penalty of the perpetrator to God for his judgement. It isn’t necessary for you to go and tell them they are forgiven especially if they made no attempt to ask for your forgiveness.
There is another scripture, Matthew 18:21-22, “Then Peter came to Jesus and asked, ‘Lord, how many times shall I forgive my brother who sins against me? Up to seven times?’ Jesus answered, ‘I tell you, not just seven times, but seventy-seven times!'” If someone sincerely asks for forgiveness we are required to forgive them.
But it seems that there is a discrepancy here. Someone needs to ask for forgiveness before you have to forgive them or is it that you must forgive them whether they ask or not, otherwise God will not forgive you. Even if it is the case that forgiveness must be sought after forgiving still releases you. It seems unfair but the time will come when justice is served and God will meet out the proper judgement.
Psalm 32:1-5
Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven,
whose sins are covered.
Blessed is the man
whose iniquity the LORD does not count against him,
in whose spirit there is no deceit.
When I kept silent, my bones became brittle
from my groaning all day long.
For day and night
Your hand was heavy upon me;
my strength was drainedd
as in the summer heat.
Selah
Then I acknowledged my sin to You
and did not hide my iniquity.
I said, “I will confess my transgressions to the LORD,”
and You forgave the guilt of my sin.
